Harbus

Issue date: 2/23/09 Section: Features

If you've been dating for five years, you live together, and you're still not engaged, he's just not that into you.

He's Just Not That Into You, based on the popular self-help book by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo, is now a movie that explores the complicated world of dating and the hints women fail to understand.

- If he always says, "We should hang out," but he doesn't actually ask you on a date…
- If he says, "I'll see you around" instead of "I'll call you tomorrow"…
- If he's dating or sleeping with someone else…
- If you've been dating for five years, you live together, and you're still not engaged…
He's Just Not That Into You.

Based on the advice doled out in the best-selling book by the same name, He's Just Not That Into You is the story of four different women in their quest for love and commitment. Ginnifer Goodwin stars as Gigi, a young women desperately trying to unravel the mysteries of dating. Justin Long plays a bar owner who Gigi repeatedly seeks out for blunt dating advice. Jennifer Connelly plays Gigi's coworker, Janine, who is married to Ben (Bradley Cooper). Ben meets Anna (Scarlett Johansson), a beautiful yoga instructor aspiring to be a singer. Anna is torn between having an adventurous affair with married Ben or enjoying the comfortable affection of her friend Conor (Kevin Connolly). Gigi's other coworker Beth (Jennifer Aniston), has been in a happy, long-term relationship with Neil for several years (Ben Affleck), but is getting increasingly discontent with his reluctance to get married. Drew Barrymore has a fairly minor role as another single co-worker of Gigi's and Kris Kristofferson makes a cameo as Beth's compassionate father.

This movie's value lies not in the complexity of its plot nor its moving performances. He's Just Not that Into You's success is in its ability to make the audience empathize with the characters as they navigate the complicated, confusing world of dating. Throughout the film, I found myself repeatedly cringing at the women's blunders, recognizing my own past failures to understand those six simple words. Though painful to watch at times, the movie entertains and enlightens.

Although the primary focus of the plot is on dating and marriage, the film also explores the nature of friendship among women. The movie portrays other women as responsible for naively perpetuating the myths of "He's just intimidated by you," "He's just really busy," and "He'll leave his wife for you." When the women are lamenting the ambiguity of the state of their romantic relationships, their girl friends rush to provide a story of how their cousin's cousin was in the exact same situation-and now she and the guy are blissfully married, thus giving the desperate woman more fuel to run the engine of her denial. At the same time, women are portrayed as extremely supportive of and loving toward one another. To the film's credit, women are rarely portrayed as directly competing with one another for a man's attention. Even in the case of the woman whose husband is cheating on her, there is no "showdown" between the two women. Thus, the focus of the film is rightly put not on men's actions or other women's actions but on our control over own actions and how we react to different situations.

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