Spring Break
Perspectives on Depression & Loneliness at HBS
A Different HBS Experience
Claude Drevet (OC), Contributing Writer
Issue date: 11/24/08 Section: Viewpoints
Prior to meeting my class in the fall of 2008, I repeatedly heard that the networks you participate in and the friendships you build at HBS are just as important as the material discussed in class. I quickly learned as a new father, and the husband of a full time pharmacist, that there is little time at HBS to socialize with my classmates. It has taken a solid year to learn how to balance getting to know my classmates, spending time with family, and academics.
This short article was born from a request from a friend to explore how HBS may seem lonely at times, from the perspective of different groups of people. Relative to most of my classmates, I would easily fit into the "old and boring" category. I am a few years older than most of my classmates and the thought of drinking and partying until the wee hours of the morning is about as appealing to me as getting through another CFM case. I also fit into a very small group of students who are busy raising their children with a career mom who is just as busy as the fathers (or vice versa for any student moms out there).
The biggest surprise when my wife and I arrived at HBS was the amount of families that had a stay at home parent. In just a few months into our RC year, many of the stay at home parents were able to establish some great friendships with one another in the close-knit HBS community. While the Partners Club and the Crimson Kids made a great effort to reach out to us, it was impossible to get involved. My wife worked every other weekend and would get home late during the week. As a result, we barely could see each other, let alone have time to hang out with the many great families on campus.
In addition, our attendance at section social events is almost as infrequent as our involvement in the Partners Club and Crimson Kids. First, ninety percent of the section events involve fancy evening dinner parties or late night starts at local bars - both tough to join with an infant. Second, there is always a high probability that my wife will be working on occasions that the section organizes a "family" event on the weekends.
This short article was born from a request from a friend to explore how HBS may seem lonely at times, from the perspective of different groups of people. Relative to most of my classmates, I would easily fit into the "old and boring" category. I am a few years older than most of my classmates and the thought of drinking and partying until the wee hours of the morning is about as appealing to me as getting through another CFM case. I also fit into a very small group of students who are busy raising their children with a career mom who is just as busy as the fathers (or vice versa for any student moms out there).
The biggest surprise when my wife and I arrived at HBS was the amount of families that had a stay at home parent. In just a few months into our RC year, many of the stay at home parents were able to establish some great friendships with one another in the close-knit HBS community. While the Partners Club and the Crimson Kids made a great effort to reach out to us, it was impossible to get involved. My wife worked every other weekend and would get home late during the week. As a result, we barely could see each other, let alone have time to hang out with the many great families on campus.
In addition, our attendance at section social events is almost as infrequent as our involvement in the Partners Club and Crimson Kids. First, ninety percent of the section events involve fancy evening dinner parties or late night starts at local bars - both tough to join with an infant. Second, there is always a high probability that my wife will be working on occasions that the section organizes a "family" event on the weekends.
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