Spring Break
Bush Drops H-Bomb on Kim Jong-Il; N. Korea Ends Nuclear Program
Issue date: 10/14/03 Section: H-BS - Humor
It was then that Kim called Bush back and told him that he was "sorry about this whole nuclear thing" and that his country would "immediately desist from developing any weapons of mass destruction." Sources claim that Kim felt it was better to stop his program now than try to match wits with an HBS grad. According to a member of North Korea's foreign ministry, "Our great leader Kim Jong-Il used to think Bush was a 'dope,' but once he found he went to HBS, Kim figured Bush had to be a lot smarter than he because 'nobody gets in to HBS just because he comes from an important family. He must have had great undergraduate grades and years of impressive work experience."
The United Nations and France where outraged at Bush's decision to drop the H-Bomb. "President Bush should have consulted the U.N. Security Council," said an angry Jacque Chirac, President of France. "Even though Bush was successful in disarming North Korea, there is no justification for a unilateral decision to drop such an obnoxious bit of information about oneself." U.N. Secretary General Kofi Anan agrees. "Bush's decision threatens the viability of the U.N. as a standalone organization. It also threatens to turn global diplomacy into Spring Break in Costa Rica where H-Bombs are dropped right and left."
Political analyst and H-Bomb expert Greg Rebuck agrees that Bush should have sought out global support for his important decision, but disagrees that the success of Bush's bombing campaign is going to start a wave of H-Bombs being dropped on the international political arena. "Seven presidents have graduated from at least one school at Harvard and the H-Bomb, to my knowledge, has only been dropped once before," said Rebuck.
"And President John F. Kennedy didn't even use it to influence a global political decision. He merely used it to pick up a German waitress after his 'Ich bin ein Berliner' speech in 1963."
The United Nations and France where outraged at Bush's decision to drop the H-Bomb. "President Bush should have consulted the U.N. Security Council," said an angry Jacque Chirac, President of France. "Even though Bush was successful in disarming North Korea, there is no justification for a unilateral decision to drop such an obnoxious bit of information about oneself." U.N. Secretary General Kofi Anan agrees. "Bush's decision threatens the viability of the U.N. as a standalone organization. It also threatens to turn global diplomacy into Spring Break in Costa Rica where H-Bombs are dropped right and left."
Political analyst and H-Bomb expert Greg Rebuck agrees that Bush should have sought out global support for his important decision, but disagrees that the success of Bush's bombing campaign is going to start a wave of H-Bombs being dropped on the international political arena. "Seven presidents have graduated from at least one school at Harvard and the H-Bomb, to my knowledge, has only been dropped once before," said Rebuck.
"And President John F. Kennedy didn't even use it to influence a global political decision. He merely used it to pick up a German waitress after his 'Ich bin ein Berliner' speech in 1963."
